“I feel small when I am next to you
I feel big when I forget you.”

–Luscious Jackson, “Deep Shag”

“Boss!” Ammer and Inna both called, as Inna ran at a full sprint after Loona and Pryvani, carrying Ammer in her breast pocket.

“This needs to be quick, we’re meeting with the floor leader in….”

“…just a couple minutes, yeah, I know. You need to see this, it just came through.”

Inna handed her pad over to Loona, saying, “Just take my pad. If it locks, passcode is Ashay-Mu-Mu-Epsilon-Rhombil.”

“How do you remember that?” Loona said with a smirk, as she started to play the video that was up on the desktop. She hadn’t gotten more than twenty seconds in before she gasped sharply, simultaneously with Pryvani.

“We got it from Avalon. Don’t know how they got it. But it certainly appears legit.”

Loona looked over at Pryvani, and Pryvani looked back, aghast. “You realize the implications….”

“Obviously,” Ammer said. “Show it to Zeramblin.”

“Our possession of this may be illegal,” Loona said.

“Leave that to me,” Pryvani said. “I can transfer the file while we walk. He won’t go after me. I’ll get this back to you after the meeting, Inna.”

“Of course, Senator. Take your time. Just…um….”

“I won’t look at the photos on it,” Pryvani said. Then, with a slight smile, she added, “At least, not much.”

Inna felt sure she was blushing, Ammer just chuckled as the two legislators walked away.

“How can you laugh at that? It’s…there’s…I mean, I don’t want her laughing at them. Tiny you and giant me…and not just because I’m a Titan.”

“First, I need to lose more weight than you do, and second, even on the remote chance she isn’t kidding, she wouldn’t laugh. Trust me. I’ve met her husband.”

“Husband? She’s not married,” Inna said, as they turned back for the office.

“Is too. Just doesn’t publicize it.”

“That’s ridiculous. Pryvani Tarsuss’s husband would be an instant celebrity.”

“Well, sure, but…let’s just say I can look him in the eye.”

Inna frowned, then looked down at him. “Huh…oh. Oh! Really?”

“Really. He’s a former Epistratichos in the Avalonian guard – equivalent of Praetor. Tough bastard. Once a Titan tried to eat him. He blew her up from the inside.”

“Gorram. That would be about the level of guts you’d have to have to marry Senator Tarsuss.”

“No, that’s the level of guts you’d have to have just to date her,” he said.

“Hm. Senator Tarsuss married a human.”

“Yup. Share that and I have to kill you.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t share it,” Inna said with a smile. “And you wouldn’t have to kill me. She has people who could take care of that, I’d wager. No, it’s just…I might have to have a chat with her at some point.”

“Why’s that?”

“You know…reasons,” Inna said.

* * *

“…so I stayed with her. Not sure why, looking back on it; twat could take care of herself. But believe me, I’m not complaining. It’s been an interesting ride. Up there, bright-eyes.”

“How many humans are there in the Empire?” Viktor asked, fascinated. “A handful? Dozens? Hundreds?”

Darren looked over at Alesia, and she back at him. Neither was sure this was really the best time to explain the long and difficult history of humans in the Titan Empire. Of course, neither was particularly sure that there was ever a good time to go over it; it was the kind of discussion that tends to be awful no matter how it’s approached.

Finally, Darren shrugged. “Well, I don’t know about the Empire, I’ve actually ended up on a colony. We’ve got a couple million there. It’s our world; won’t lie, we’ve got support from a philanthropist, liked the idea of having a preserve for humans. But it’s a pleasant enough place. Almost Earth.”

“Millions?” Tatenda said, agog. “How? How could that be?”

“Not hard,” Darren said. “They’ve been coming here for five thousand years, give or take. We’re humans. We have kids. Hell, I’ve got six.”

“This philanthropist…what is her ulterior motive?” Viktor asked.

“Huh?”

“What does she get out of it?”

Darren chuckled. “Honestly, a whole lot of headaches.”

“She’s a friend of mine,” Alesia said, “and of Darren’s. You met Sorcha; Pryvani paid for the team of scientists. She’s trying…well, I know some Earth history. I think you can guess that a species that’s one-twenty-fourth the size of the dominant one, that lives about a sixth as long…we’re not viewed as exactly fully equal by the Titans.”

“Nice way of puttin’ it, bright-eyes,” Darren said.

“Thanks. Pryvani is trying, a lot of Titans are. It just takes time to change minds.”

Tatenda sighed. “I suppose it was too much to hope that they were better than we have been.”

“Yup. It was,” Darren said. “But they’re not all bad, and what they get wrong…well, they have a tendency to want to keep everyone safe, and that can be good and it can be bad. Avalon was put there in the first place to keep some humans healthy in case something went horribly wrong on Earth, and let’s face it, we’ve come close to doing ourselves in a few times. But Pryvani’s been helping us to build it up. It’s more than a lifeboat now. A lot more.”

“Well, whatever the circumstances…it will be good to get to know your people, Darren. And yours, Alesia. And if any of you want to return to Earth, I will do everything I can to make sure we welcome you back. Assuming, of course, I ever get back to Earth,” Tatenda said with a smile.

Darren smiled tightly, because that was going to be the tricky part.

* * *

Tigoni and Rixie had left the room almost immediately; Tig admitted she’d tied Ulala up, and remembered she had an emetic back in her pack. The five of them set out, Rixie carrying Alex in her stomach, Tig carrying Ted and Hala in a jacket pocket.

On the way to the room, the two humans talked.

“So…Ted,” Hala said with a raised eyebrow.

“So what, Hala?”

“Tigoni.”

“Hm?”

“What’s the deal with Tigoni?”

“Well, she’s a pilot, very nice, grew up on a planet called Graylow, something like that….”

“Not what I’m asking and you know it.”

Ted blinked, using his gool to augment the dim light in Tig’s pocket. “Hala…if she asked me to marry her, right now, I’d say yes.”

Hala laughed out loud. “You’ve known her two days.”

“I know.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

“I know.”

“She has fingers bigger than you.”

“I know!”

Hala laughed. “Only you, Ted, could meet a woman the size of a building and think, ‘Yeah, I can satisfy her.’”

Ted sighed. “Hala…it’s not…that’s…I really don’t, to be honest.”

Hala rolled her eyes, then looked at him again. “Wait, you’re serious.”

“I am. I know, I’ve got a bit of a reputation.”

“A bit?”

“I earned it. But this…this isn’t like that. It isn’t. I mean, when you and I…I like you, you like me, but we both kind of knew it was for fun. I hope.”

“I did,” Hala said. “It was! It was just what I needed after breaking up with Wafia. I don’t regret it.”

“Me either. But this…if she never let me touch her, I’d still be smitten. It’s not about that.”

Hala raised her eyebrows.

“Okay, it’s not not about that, but it’s not the main thing. I don’t know if I could ever be enough for her. I’ve gotta try, though. If I’m not…well, then I’m not. But I have to try.”

Hala chuckled. “Ted Martínez, I have never seen you like this,” she said. “Not even when you were complementing my feet one toe at a time. But…really, be careful. As a friend, I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“She wouldn’t hurt me,” he said, quietly.

“She’d better not,” Hala said. “Or she’s gonna have to answer to me. And don’t think I won’t tell her that.”

They were quiet for a bit, before Hala said, quietly, “Ted? One more thing. I figured out the toga.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. You don’t have to talk about it. But if you need to, I’m always here. Alex is right. It wasn’t your fault.”

“Thanks,” he said, trying to put it out of his mind, and focus instead on the gentle rocking of Tigoni’s pocket as she walked down the corridor.

* * *

“Centurium on Deck,” the watch officer called, as Kir walked into the Detention Level watch room.

“As you were. Mr. Ghent, you are relieved.”

“Sir?”

“Nothing wrong with your performance; just taking a watch, given our prisoners.”

“Yes, sir,” the watch officer said, standing. “I am relieved.”

Kir settled down into the watch officer’s station, for what had to be the first time in fifteen years. Nevertheless, he began cycling through controls as if he’d never left; if the three other officers in the watch room thought anything was amiss, they didn’t show it.

Kir studied his hand for a long moment as it hovered over the comm button; at long last, he hit it. “Dr. Bass?”

“Yes?” Eyrn answered from the detention cell.

“In about forty-five minutes, I’m going to need all Titans out of that cell for a few minutes. We need to run a scan for any pathogens that the humans might be carrying.”

“Horse is out of the barn on that one, isn’t it?”

“Huh?”

Eyrn sighed. “If they’ve got pathogens, we’ve got them now, too.”

“No, we’re specifically looking for human pathogens, not ones that can cross species. But you could screw up the scan.”

There was a long pause. “I understand,” Eyrn said, “but if this can wait, I’d like it to.”

“It really can’t,” Kir said. “It really can’t.”

* * *

“Thank you for agreeing to meet with us on such short notice, Mr. Floor Leader.”

“Gotta admit, Rep. Armac, you probably wouldn’t have been my first choice for a visit right now, but how could I say no to the lovely Sen. Tarsuss?” Zeramblin said, focusing his attention on Pryvani, or at the very least, her not inconsiderable décolletage.

Pryvani tittered. “Mr. Floor Leader, please, you’re embarrassing me.”

“Oh, I can’t imagine that’s true; you’ve got to know that you’re easily the prettiest legislator around. Why, the capital seems just a bit brighter with you in it, Senator.”

“Well, thank you,” Pryvani flirted. “I’m just happy you were able to find a few minutes to meet with me and Loona.”

“Always glad to oblige, Senator,” he said. His smile faded as he turned to Loona; sending Pryvani Tarsuss along was a bit transparent, he thought, but hells, he’d always been a sucker for a pretty face and dyed hair. If that meant he had to argue with Loona Armac, so be it.

“Rep. Armac, I gather you’re here about a first contact bill; I’m waiting on information from the military before I move anything.”

“Understandable,” Loona said, as Pryvani began to fiddle with her pad. “But I think that it’s important that the legislature has a plan for what happens when we learn that the humans are knocking on Titan Station’s door.”

“Well, now, I’d feel more like you were greeting me in the spirit of peace and harmony if you’d said that before you let Rep. Zimm kick my ass, but that’s the game. I know you want first contact, and probably a whole lot more. First contact…well, we’d rather not take the vote unless we have to, but we may have to. But more rights? Full citizenship? No way my caucus will even think about that.”

“Of course not. The Aspire caucus wants to avoid a vote on full citizenship before the next election, at the very least.”

“Hmm. Yes, I know, which is why you know and I know that if I have to bring first contact legislation to the floor, I’m gonna have someone move a citizenship amendment just to twist the knife. Let it fail, but force you to choose between hacking off the young and getting reelected. If my people have to give in on first contact, I’m going to make it painful for you first.”

“No, you won’t,” Loona said with a disarming smile.

“And why not?”

“Garma Gleebo.”

Zeramblin looked down and chuckled. “Gleebo, huh? Hardly the same.”

“Isn’t it? I read the polls, and I’m just a deputy minority whip. I know damn well you do. One hundred years from now, humans are going to be full citizens. It’ll be true in fifty years. It’ll probably be true in ten years. Might be true in five.”

“Your point, representative?”

“My point, Mr. Floor Leader, is that when humans join the Empire – and it is when, as you just tacitly admitted – the last Floor Leader to block their path is going to be remembered like the Floor Leader who stood up against allowing the Dunnermacs in. He’ll be reviled, forever on the wrong side of history. Gleebo is remembered for being a bigot. You want to be remembered, Mr. Floor Leader, but not that way.”

“Well, that assumes this happens soon. If it happens in fifty years, I’m Janka Palamar – twice the bigot that Gleebo ever was, but nobody remembers that about her.”

“True,” Loona said, with a smile. “But why take that chance? You aren’t stepping down before the next election, and the odds are you’re going to be re-elected. If you’re here another five years from now…polls are only going one direction, you know.”

Zeramblin smiled his most plastic smile. “We’re almost out of time, Rep. Armac. What’s your proposal?”

“A citizenship vote isn’t in either of our interests. But simply ignoring it doesn’t make it go away. I propose we authorize first contact should the humans try to contact us, and create a joint committee of the House and Senate to study the human question and put forth a bill.”

“Yippie. Then what?”

“That bill gets an up-or-down vote, no amendments, no changes.”

“And why would I agree to that?”

“Because the committee chair will report directly to the Floor Leader – and will call the question whenever the Floor Leader requests it…including immediately before the election, should he choose to do so.”

Loona smiled. She’d been very surprised that the Minority Leader had given her the go-ahead on that, even knowing Dindraves was planning to retire – but she knew it was the clincher.

Zeramblin leaned back in his chair, eyebrows raised. “You’re handing me a very big stick, Rep. Armac. Do you think I won’t use it?”

“I think you might. But I think getting first contact authorized is worth it. And I definitely think finally moving toward some sort of real discussion on the future of humans in the Empire is worth it.”

“Who chairs it?”

“Oh! Could I chair it?” Pryvani said, suddenly speaking up. “I’ve always wanted to chair a committee. You get to ring the bell when people speak too long, call people out of order – it looks fun.”

“Well, I don’t know,” Loona said. “You’d have to work with the Floor Leader quite a bit.”

“Oh, I don’t see that being a problem,” Zeramblin said. “In fact, I think you’d make a fine chair, Senator.”

Zeramblin paused; Loona went for the kill.

“Look, you got beat down pretty hard this morning, Mr. Floor Leader. But you bring this bill, you can put the blame where it belongs – on the military that failed to tell you what you needed to know. And you take the initiative. You’re not Gleebo. You’re Tez Magilna.”

The Floor Leader smiled. “Well, I hope not. I’d rather not get shot. But at least I’m not the guy who got whupped this morning. All right. We’ll make it fourteen people, four Senators, ten Representatives. I name seven of the remaining slots, you get me six more names – well, five, as I assume you want to sit on the committee, Rep. Armac. And one more thing – you have to give a speech on the floor during debate praising my leadership on this issue.”

Loona smiled broadly. “This is not a caucus issue, this is an Imperial issue. Why wouldn’t I praise the Floor Leader’s remarkable vision in seeking a solution to a problem that vexes us?”

“Maybe laying it on too thick, but I’m not complaining. All right, get me the language for the file, I’ll tweak it and get a draft together.”

“Oh, I almost forgot!” Pryvani said, as they started to get up. “Someone sent me this thing…where is it,” she said, checking her pad. “Oh yeah. Said some Navarchos was being rude about you, Mr. Floor Leader. Not sure where I got this – people send me all kinds of things, you know.”

“Really,” Zeramblin said. “Which Navarchos?”

“I think it was Navarchos Solis; I met him at a party once. Very stern. Ah! Here it is,” she said, spinning the tablet and handing it to the Floor Leader.

The video played, Solis admonishing an underling. “You are ordered to not discuss the situation on Titan with any civilian authority, including the Office of the Floor Leader. All inquiries are to be directed to me.”

“But…sir,” the officer replied, “regulation 037.2….”

“Screw the regulations!” Solis bellowed. “I’m giving you a direct order, Bass!”

“Acknowledged,” The officer said. “So if the Floor Leader does call me, and asks me what’s going on….”

“You are to tell him only that the human ship is no longer in orbit around Titan or any other moon in the Saturnian system. And then direct him to speak with me.”

The video stopped. Zeramblin looked down at it in white hot fury. “Where…where did you get this?”

“I dunno. I’ll check with my staff. I mean, you wouldn’t believe how much stuff comes in every day. But they heard I was meeting with you, thought you’d want to see that.”

Rodrec Zeramblin looked up at Loona, just a bit of a smile on his face. “You know that this was probably obtained illegally.”

“Almost certainly, but that’s not the Senator’s fault.”

“No, it isn’t. It might be yours – wouldn’t put it past Ammer Smit to send this to Sen. Tarsuss’s office, knowing she was meeting with me. But then, I’ve got bigger issues, don’t I?”

“I would think so.”

Zeramblin chuckled. “Well, looks like that first contact bill is a certainty; get me those names as soon as possible. I’ll file it as an urgency. We’ll schedule debate first thing tonight. I have a few calls to make, and a tupploving piece of sarbie shaka to destroy.”

“Of course. Thank you for your time, Mr. Floor Leader.”

“And yours, representative. And tell Ammer when you see him that he played it well; half the reason I’m not ready for human citizenship is that I want to be retired before he takes a seat on the floor. As for you, Senator, I very much look forward to working with you more closely.”

“Great!” Pryvani said with a winning smile. “I can’t wait, Roddy. Oh…sorry. I suppose Mr. Floor Leader is the proper title.”

“Heh,” Zeramblin said, flipping through his pad for a couple contacts. “From you, Roddy is just fine.”

* * *

“Tigoni? No, she didn’t assault me, ma’am. She couldn’t. She knows I would have to make her suffer for it later,” Ulala said, with more than a bit of a growl.

“You mean, like stealing something and making me think it was lost?” Tigoni answered.

Ulala sighed; she had to admit, her plan had backfired rather spectacularly. She had realized – about fifteen minutes after getting tied up and twenty-five minutes before she worked her way free – that Ted’s disappearance, far from dissuading Tig, had instead made her actions inevitable.

This didn’t make Ulala less angry, of course, but it did mean at least a third of her anger was directed at herself, enough that she was still just barely able to think of Tigoni as her friend. Just barely.

“Yeah, after I did that, we’d probably call it even, though no promises. Anyhow, I never saw the attacker.”

“Too bad.”

“By the way, ma’am….”

“Stun-probe to the artificial larynx. Lucky it works at all,” Rixie said. “Ms. Belfsec, did you find that medicine?”

“I did, ma’am,” Tig said, digging through the medkit. She was extremely surprised to be back in Ulala’s room; even more surprised that so far, the Imperator seemed to be in no particular hurry to arrest her. She handed the bottle to Rixie, who headed straight for the bathroom.

As the door closed, Tig said, in a whisper, “I’m sorry, Ula.”

“I know,” Ulala said. “I shouldn’t have taken Ted. How’d you figure it out?”

“He told me.”

“He…okay. Wow,” Ulala laughed. “He found you?”

“He’s in my pocket,” Tig said. “You can apologize to him directly.”

“Tig, I just don’t even. Next you’ll tell me that even with an Imperator following you around, you’ve got Maj. Nejem in there, too.”

Tig grinned.

Ulala stared at her, and just shook her head. “Oh dear Emperor, you are an idiot. But kind of an impressive one.”

A few units away, Rixie prepared to take a swig of a stomach irritant.

“Now, do not swallow this, Alex. It’ll make you vomit much more than me.”

“I don’t think that’s possible. I will say, though, I’ll kind a miss this. It’s cozy. Nice and warm. Surrounded by you. Only smells a little bit like barf. Really, not bad.”

“Well…I guess, if you ever want to again….”

“Oh, fuck no. Go ahead and drink that stuff, I promise, I’ll keep my mouth shut.”

“To that wonderful day,” Rixie quietly toasted, before downing the liquid.

It took just a few moments before her stomach began to rumble. The queasy, out of control feeling would be familiar to any organism with a digestive system, but what was less familiar was what Alex dealt with; Rixie’s stomach, which had been reasonably accommodating up until this point, suddenly had decided that everything in it had to go, immediately. Alex was squeezed tightly, and without warning, as Rixie heaved, he was pushed right back up the tube he’d so recently been pushed down. He blinked in surprise as he was suddenly engulfed in light, flying through a set of teeth, and landing in Rixie’s hands.

“Gah,” she complained, in the voice of Alvin, Simon, and/or Theodore, “Gotta be more careful about what I eat.”

She said it with a grin, though, and while Alex was covered in head to toe with the contents of her stomach, she still kissed him softly before moving him under the running water.

“I am sorry,” she said, as she finished rinsing him and her hands clean.

“My fault,” Alex said. “You know, I didn’t get that voicebox done, do you want….”

“No,” Rixie said, as her pad began to chirp with an incoming call.

* * *

“Navarchos Bass?”

Aertimus held a coldpack on his chin in his office. “Yes?”

“The Navarchos Imperii for you, sir.”

“Send him through.”

Aertimus was ready for this call. He knew exactly what Solis was going to tell him to do, and he knew exactly what his own reply would be.

“Navarchos Bass?”

“Aye, sir.”

“First, I want you to understand, I take no joy in this. Navarchos, you are ordered to terminate the crew of the ship from Earth, immediately.”

Aertimus actually laughed. “You can’t be serious, sir.”

“I’m deadly serious, Navarchos. I know you have a soft spot for Earth, but we cannot wait around until they become a danger to send this message.”

“Sir, they aren’t a danger.”

“Not yet. But you and I both know how rapidly they are advancing. In another hundred years, they will have surpassed our technological level, barring catastrophe. When that day comes, the Titan Empire will inevitably fall, consumed by these tiny savages.”

“It needn’t,” Aertimus said. “If we work with them….”

“We cannot trust them, and we cannot wait for them to get stronger. They need a lesson even a savage can understand. Kill them. That is an order.”

“They’re Class Two Sentient Beings! I can’t kill them if they’re unarmed. You can’t order me to do so. You lack the authority to do so, under Imperial Statute and the Rules of Military Conduct. Navarchos Imperii, I am disregarding your orders as unlawful, and unless you rescind them immediately I will be passing along to the office of the Floor Leader the video of our conversation where you told me to lie to him.”

Solis frowned, and Aertimus smiled. “It’s your choice, sir.”

“You’d be risking your career.”

“I’ll go to Rura Penthe if need be.”

Solis sighed. He had been afraid it would work out like this.

“Very well. I will not order you to kill them, Aertimus,” Solis sighed. “We’ll see how long you remain in command. Solis out.”

Aerti let go of a deep breath. He couldn’t believe it had been this easy. He could live without his command if it meant the crew of the Lem went free. It was a small sacrifice. All right, he’d note this in the log, and go to Kir. He was already bucking Solis, he was going to free the humans, and contact Tuaut directly. This could be salvaged, at long last. In his relief, he found himself chuckling and grinning. And he kept laughing and chuckling, right up until he saw Lysis and Zhan enter the room, frantically trying to get his attention.